DON’T DATE Your Friends EX!!!

Cutting through Katy’s Bad Advice: Real Relationship/Dating Answers from Adam Knight!

Despite what you may have heard: IT IS NEVER OK TO DATE YOU FRIEND’S EX!!!

Askmen’s David Wygant is WRONG and Katy is spreading dangerous misconceptions and advice. Here’s her article: http://wp.me/p1iMxU-6Pc

 Katy the hopeless romantic, the very young, very naïve midday DJ on Candy 95 has given you guys some bad advice.  Guys, Bro Code Rule #87 clearly states, “A Bro never dates his friend’s EX.”  And more importantly Bro Code Rule #150 gets more graphic, but basically says, “A Bro never has sex with his friend’s Ex, UNLESS, she is a 9 or 10, then it’s okay to hit it and quit it.”

 Honestly, dating a Bro’s ex is a sure way to lose that friend forever.  Sure you were her friend when she was dating your boy, but as soon as they broke up; she lost you in the divorce.  So your friend breaks up with his girl, and she calls you to ‘vent’ or ‘just have someone to talk to’ JUST SAY NO.  Dude you are way too busy with your own pursuit of the fairer sex to listen to her whine about your boy. You wouldn’t listen to a first date drone on and on about her ex, why would you listen to her bad mouth your boy? Real bro’s aren’t the sympathetic shoulder to cry on, that’s what pathetic whiney metro non-closers were put on this Earth for.  Let the “Friendzone” guys smell her hair, and get all worked up while she sobs as he’s holding her hand watching Lifetime’s Movie of the Week, dreaming she might fall asleep next to him on the couch.  The REAL MEN, like you and me, Broseph we have better things to do, like close on some new chick or watch some football, or if you’re awesome like me…both at the same time.

Now what if your boy was really into this chick, and she dumped him?  If that is the case, a true Bro would never imagine dating that jezebel.  In fact, it’s your job to make sure your boy moves on as quickly as possible, and gets on to better things.  This includes, being rude to the ex, making her uncomfortable at bars or social settings where they used to hang out together, and to make sure their mutual friends all side with your bro.

What is this “real connection” line of BS?  Guys unless you’ve been reading too many Nicolas Sparks or Twilight books, you know that love is nothing more than a chemical reaction in the brain, comparable to eating large amounts of chocolate, and makes women totally susceptible to persuasion.  Bros don’t fall for this “real connection” line of CRAP.  Do you think she really felt a connection with you? Did you forget that your friend hooked up with her at a Halloween Party when they both came dressed as Lady Gaga? If she really had wanted you, she would’ve picked you, in your Royal Canadian Mountie Uniform.  So what is she really trying to do? She’s trying to make your friend jealous or mess with his mind.  Women are diabolical psychologically manipulative masterminds, they are trained at secret training summer camps from an early age, and have daily meetings in women’s restrooms across the world, that are equipped with Wi-Fi, so they can look guys up in their dude database.  If he dumped her, she’s out for blood, and she will use you or anyone else in her way to relish in her reciprocity.  Don’t be fooled bro, you’re only collateral damage in her eyes, and there is no “connection”.

If you don’t believe me, look at history.  Would Camelot have fallen if Lancelot hadn’t horizontally jousted with his boy Arthur’s chick?  Would Troy have fallen if Paris hadn’t hooked up with another man’s wife?  Guys, if we learned anything from Ghostbusters, we learned to “Never Cross the STREAMS!”  Seriously Bro, you wanna be Captain Picard, boldly go where no man’s gone before.  Don’t fall for this “The Notebook”-like propaganda, vampires don’t sparkle in the sunlight, no person would ever wait that long for someone, and NO GOOD CAN EVER COME FROM DATING YOUR FRIEND’S EX!!!

-Adam Knight