More Proof Facebook Owns You: Relationship Edition

Let’s be real here, you’re out in the real world and meet somebody great. But in today’s society of creeps and weirdos you have to check him/her out right? How many of you can honestly tell me that you don’t immediately search someone on facebook after you meet? It’s almost been engrained in our brains if someone doesn’t have a facebook.. that’s a huge red flag. He/she is probably married with 4 kids or an escaped murderer/rapist evading police.. maybe both. Am I right?

Well, the good people at market researchers Lot 42 surveyed 500 social network users aged 18+, and asked them some pretty personal relationship questions.. basically confirming what we already know to be the sad truth. Facebook not just runs..but owns our lives. Here are the results:

Mind bomb: 1/3 of the people surveyed have broken up with someone via technology be it text message, email, or facebook. FACEBOOK? I’m imagining this is one of those sneak attacks where you change your facebook status and that’s how your partner finds out. When your notifications informs you you are single, you are. And even more surprising is 40% of people said they haven’t broken up with someone in this manner – but they WOULD. What happened to common courtesy people? Don’t hide behind your gadgets, unless you’re in a long distance relationship or dating someone online (where you’re communicating primarily via the internet anyways..), break up with someone directly.

Another jarring point of this study is that 52% of people immediately change their facebook status after a break up. Because that’s the first thing on my mind when my boyfriend of x amount of years breaks up with me – it’s time to alert the people I went to high school with that I can’t keep a man.

Lastly I’d like to highlight the first portion of the survey. Notice the response for the important trait your partner should possess: not physical attractiveness, strong family values, shared humor and personality, but “other.”

My friends, we are all doomed.

What do you think about this survey? Confirms what you already knew or are your surprised we rely so heavily on our social networking?

And more importantly, would you ever break up with someone via text message, email, or facebook? Or maybe you already have.. ?