A listener emailed me yesterday with some pretty big news. Her fiance dumped her just before Christmas. Here’s the email:
I saw on your blog you helped a listener a few weeks ago and I was hoping you could help me. My fiance and I just split up, but I’m not sure if I should tell my family just yet. My mom gets so stressed out around this time of year. I don’t want to add to that by telling her the bad news. But I also don’t want to keep wearing this ring and telling everyone how great a guy Josh is. That’s one of the worst parts- they love him. They tell me all the time how lucky I am.
In an effort to keep my family off my back, I am now the one who will spend the holidays super stressed.
What should I do? I can think of nothing worse than getting a little pity party from my extended family on Christmas Eve but I don’t know if I can hold this in.
Let me just start by saying I’m flattered that people are coming to me with problems.. especially because I’m really not qualified to help. I also hope you punched this guy in the throat for breaking up with you right before Christmas.
I think you should tell them- immediately. In fact, sometime today. Why go through the holidays stressed out when you’re already upset? Okay so your mom might worry about you and you might be adding a little bit extra to her plate, but she’ll still be upset after the holidays when she hears the news.
You’re not ruining Christmas with this information. And the sooner you tell the family, the sooner you can relax and actually enjoy yourself.
Take the ring off your finger, pawn it for extra holiday cash, and just be honest about the @*%( you almost got sucked into marrying.
Am I wrong? If you had big news, like a break up or maybe even a pregnancy, would you wait until after the holidays? When is the best time to tell the family?