Do You SPY on Your Significant Other?

I know one too many people in my life that refer to “facebook stalking” exes, new prospects, old classmates, merely as “research.”

Oh, who am I kidding. I will be the first to admit, that even I love sometimes keeping tabs with people via social networking sites. I enjoy the occasional dip behind enemy lines, especially when the information is so readily available and easy to access!

But THAT is where I draw the spying line, if you could even call it that.

Which is why, when I heard about this couple from Houston.. where a guy had put up recording devices to try and catch his lover “in the act” .. I couldn’t help but think, isn’t that a little too far?

I mean if you are going to such great lengths to prove someone is cheating, I’d say the pair of you have way bigger issues. Right?

The one time I ever went through a boyfriend’s cell phone, it was more of a confirmation. I mean the guy’s grandma had died twice in the four months we were together, and I couldn’t help but notice everytime he attended a “funeral” he’d come back with some pretty questionable burns and tan lines.

Call me naive I guess, but I just had to see it with my own eyes to really believe it.

So my question here is, in some healthy relationships, do you feel you have to spy on someone to ensure that everything is on track?

Even though I do have some trust issues, I seriously doubt I would let myself get to that point. You’re just driving yourself crazy and for what? Proof that you’re dating a terrible person?

The happiest and most successful relationships I’ve ever been a part of have been based entirely on trust. When you do something like log into her e-mail, or read his cellphone texts, you are completely violating that trust, and ultimately negating much of the moral high ground you could take should you find anything incriminating.

I mean what would you say if you found something? “I really lost my trust in you after I broke into your email?”

Maybe ignorance here is bliss – or am I wrong?

What do you think? Have you ever spied? Do you think spying is acceptable?


Texts to 23504

“You should not have to snoop through your significant others items. If you do, then you shouldn’t be with them. if you can’t trust someone then the relationship will fail eventually. I have never snooped because I’ve never felt the need to. If I don’t trust him, I end it. I always go with my gut. :)”

“HAHA. I can honestly say I have never even Facebook stalked my now husband. We have known each other for 13 years and been together for almost 7. I feel sorry for people whose realtionships are not built on trust.”

“I don’t understand why snoopers snoop, if someone is gonna cheat, snooping isn’t going to stop them or prevent it. I also don’t get people who stay in realtionships if they don’t have any trust. What a draning, unhappy place.”

“I checked his phone to make sure our relationship had the trust I thought it did, I found numerous messages to girls… I went with my gut and found what I felt.. 4 years wasted. Gut = always right.”

“I look through her phone occasionally because she lied to me in the beginning of the relationship.”

“Hell one thing is true you never find out anything good snooping!!!”

Whatchu think?