There’s just something about the holidays that makes you think being single is the worst thing on the planet. Not having a guy or gal in tow when shopping or visiting the family can make you feel as appealing as an unwanted lump of coal.
You could even love the fact that you’re flying solo the 11 other months of the year, but once the holiday season starts, this gets tricky. Maybe we can blame all those lousy jewelry commercials or the Hallmark channel for making you think this is a great opportunity to contact that ex you know you shouldn’t.
And how easy is that these days? You can send a “mass text” on Christmas wishing him/her well (when really all you’re doing is sending him a message to see how and if he will respond) or you can contact someone virtually painlessly via Facebook.
I don’t care how much of grandma’s eggnog you’ve consumed, stay strong and don’t let this happen to you! Nowhere in the rules of the season does it say that you should extend kindness and good will to some not-good-for-you #$*%. The holidays are NOT a valid excuse for fraternizing with the ghosts of relationships past, no matter how charming. In fact, making contact and even following through will probably only make you feel worse.. especially once the holiday haze has lifted. How do I know? I’ve been there a dozen and one times.
But mark my words, come January all you’ll be left with is lingering shame.. and there’s no gift receipt for that.
1. Erase all ex numbers from you phone and stay off Facebook. It’s like keeping ice cream out of your fridge if you’re on a diet. , Protect yourself by ex-proofing all electronic devices.. especially erasing all “high risk” phone numbers. Or just avoid your phone altogether. The holidays are a time for family not a time to give in to your random bouts of nostalgia. If you’re surrounded by friends and family, there’s no reason to have your phone surgically attached to your hand throughout the festivities.
2. Exercise. Not only does this keep your mind occupied and ward off any unwanted holiday poundage, but seriously, how hard is it to text on a treadmill? Plus you’ll be making yourself look and feel great for New Years when you can snag yourself a new guy/gal.
3. Emotionally eat and drink (a little). Don’t eat the whole pie or drink the whole bottle, but a little indulgence will make you feel merry, not to mention that sugar rush. It’s a time to celebrate, not starve yourself.
4. Buy yourself something. Something you want and don’t need. No matter how strapped you are for cash this time of year, it’s not selfish to get yourself something too. Think of it as the money you would be spending on that @(!&, going to better use.
5. Make plans and backup plans, and backups to the backup plans. Boredom leads to bad decisions. Make sure you know who is around over the holidays to deck the halls with and who is available to emergency phone calls should you find your resolve caving at 2 am after watching “The Holiday.”
What are your plans for avoiding the dreaded ex? Share ‘em in the comments.
Prank your friends or have Santa call the kids! This could be the best holiday website ever created.
You can personalize your options and then send the end product as a video or voicemail.
I just created one for Adam Knight.. with the words boo, babby daddy, and jeggings.
Create your own here!
When putting together this post, I couldn’t help but think of people from my high school to fit this list.
Merry Christmas! It’s the 12 high school classmates you will for sure run into at some point.
Thanks for the ideas COED.
Who do you most not want to see from high school?
Great website.. or GREATEST website? Some NSFW
In the world of e-greetings, there aren’t many websites that let you be as honest as you want — not to mention as anonymous as you want. One site, This Is Going To Be Awkward, gets it.
Similar to Someecards, this site offeres funny e-cards for friends, family and co-workers, but you can send them without the recipient knowing it came from you.
Got a bone to pick? A crush you need to alert? A problem with a co-worker’s odor? Now you can let them know in the most awkward way possible.
Check out the full list of cards here.
I’m still waiting for the card that reads:
“I’d enjoy watching you get hit by a bus.”
(I can think of a few guys I’d like to send those fuzzy feelings to.)
What do you think of the cards? Any saying you’d want to see added/send anonymously?
A listener emailed me yesterday with some pretty big news. Her fiance dumped her just before Christmas. Here’s the email:
I saw on your blog you helped a listener a few weeks ago and I was hoping you could help me. My fiance and I just split up, but I’m not sure if I should tell my family just yet. My mom gets so stressed out around this time of year. I don’t want to add to that by telling her the bad news. But I also don’t want to keep wearing this ring and telling everyone how great a guy Josh is. That’s one of the worst parts- they love him. They tell me all the time how lucky I am.
In an effort to keep my family off my back, I am now the one who will spend the holidays super stressed.
What should I do? I can think of nothing worse than getting a little pity party from my extended family on Christmas Eve but I don’t know if I can hold this in.
Let me just start by saying I’m flattered that people are coming to me with problems.. especially because I’m really not qualified to help. I also hope you punched this guy in the throat for breaking up with you right before Christmas.
I think you should tell them- immediately. In fact, sometime today. Why go through the holidays stressed out when you’re already upset? Okay so your mom might worry about you and you might be adding a little bit extra to her plate, but she’ll still be upset after the holidays when she hears the news.
You’re not ruining Christmas with this information. And the sooner you tell the family, the sooner you can relax and actually enjoy yourself.
Take the ring off your finger, pawn it for extra holiday cash, and just be honest about the @*%( you almost got sucked into marrying.
Am I wrong? If you had big news, like a break up or maybe even a pregnancy, would you wait until after the holidays? When is the best time to tell the family?